Breaks aren't always restful

I noticed I haven't blogged in a while. It might say that this blog is from Dec 19th. I am actually writing it on Jan 4. Mostly because I didn't think anyone read this.. but now that I know that Rachel, a friend of mine who goes to school in TN is an avid reader, I must continue to update on my life and clinical stories. I'm sad to report that I haven't come across any funny patients or situations at work lately. I am probably weird to be excited to be going back to school on Tuesday. I'm excited because it means I'm that much closer to graduating!! I've also been pretty tired of being on break. That sounds stupid I know, but it's been exhausting. I got the flu for the first part of break. I felt miserable, lost my voice and had no energy to even get out of bed. When I got better, I worked a lot up at the hospital and babysat when I wasn't working. Then I happened to pick up this nasty stomach virus from some friends of mine.. apparently it had been going around a few of the families I babysit for. The stomach virus had me couch/bathroom bound for 2 days but lingered a couple days longer. I worked some more. OH I ALMOST FORGOT! I do have a patient story to share! I'll add it to the end of this post after I share what else has been going on. I thought I'd end my break the same way I started it-in bed, not doing much of anything. I have been needing to have my wisdom teeth pulled for almost 2 years. I have been avoiding it for quite some time. Since some of my plans fell through, I called to see if they could schedule me before I went back to school. Of course the day they decided they could torture me by drilling into my mouth surgically to remove four of my back molars..had to be new years eve! The swelling has come down dramatically and the pain isn't too bad today. What worries me is the tingly feeling I still have in my face. Half of my lip is still tingly and if I open my jaw too far this sharp pain shoots through my face towards my chin. This doesn't feel pleasant. I will be checking back with the dr on Wednesday. We'll see if this is permanent or not (they warned me it could be).

OK..this is a story about a crazy child that needs some serious deliverance.
I went into work Christmas Eve morning and clocked in at 6:50 to give me some time to get to my assigned floor and get a brief report. The lady in CSO (Central Staffing Office) told me I would be sitting on the pediatric floor for the day. This excited me! I LOVE working on the peds floor. I knock on the door to the room where I'll be sitting and the sitter who had sat there for the night shift quickly stood up and hurried to get her stuff to leave. I asked her for a slight report on the kid but she didn't have much to say other than "He's been up all night. Good luck!" This has me slightly nervous. It's not usually a good thing when the person you are relieving looks frazzled and has nothing to say but "good luck". I walked over to the 5 yr old and asked him what his name was. He seemd ok to me. I told him who I was and that I'd be hanging out with him all day. This is when I saw it! T H E F I R E I N H I S E Y E S! As soon as the sitter before me left the room the boy sprang up out of bed and was across the room throwing things at me. He said to me "GET THE F*** OUT OF MY ROOM!"I was shocked! I walked over to him and squated down to his level (you know, like super nanny would do) and said "Young man, YOU will NOT talk to me like that." He said, "WHO THE F*** ARE YOU? DIDN'T YOU HEAR ME? GET THE F*** OUT OF MY ROOM YOU STUPID SH**!" At this point I was really not sure what to do. If he were my kid, I'd spank him and put him in a corner. Instead I got my calm and backed him into a corner and put him in time out. At this point I walked away to pay no attention to him. He spat on me. Gross! Then he took the window paint and started painting on everything but the windows! I took the paint from him and put him back into the corner. I squated down and said "Little boy (not really what i called him), why are you acting like this?" His response was "Because I am ANGRY (with a smirk on his face) and I Hate you!" I said, "ok" and walked to the other side of the room to clean the red paint off of the walls. He began SCREAMING so loud and high pitched that I had to close my eyes. A nurse ran into the room to see what was wrong. She looked at me first, but it was obvious I had not touched the boy, he was all the way across the room. She went over to him, picked him up and put him into the bed and said "THAT'S ENOUGH!" and he was quiet. Then I sat down. I looked at the clock, it was 7:18.

Thumping and Bumping

So as I have discovered that no one really reads my blog I can probably blog about anything I want. It is 5:48 in the morning and I'm getting ready to go to work. I have noticed some weird things going on with my own body lately. I've had a migraine that has come and gone a lot over the past 3 weeks. I have been getting light headed often when I stand up. But those two things aren't that worrisome as it could mean I have just not been getting enough fluids. The thing that has me a little nervous is the thumping and bumping I have been feeling just below my sternum or 3 inches up from my belly button. It's a pulsating feeling. When a lay down or just sit it pounds very hard. When I stand I can feel it slightly, but it mostly goes away. It feels like an alien living in my lower chest/abdominal cavity. When I push on the alien it hurts. I am going to run this by some nurses today at work and possibly one of the passing doctors. I think I could possibly have developed an abdominal aortic aneurysm. I don't really fit into age group for having one seeing that I am not over 60 and male. I just don't think its normal to be feeling the way I have been lately. Off to work.

Somehow still standing!

It was not easy, but I made it. I made it through my fourth semester of nursing school! Many were uncertain when we hit the submit button on the computer to "turn in" our final Monday morning. I had never been so worried in my life! I studied my butt of for my acute care final that was Monday. I am not sure I studied that much over the whole semester combined.... Or even for any other test I've taken in nursing school. I think my total was 19 hours of study time for my acute care final. Well, it didn't matter how much I studied. I bombed that final. It was by far the most difficult test I've taken in my entire life. I have gained quite a bit of knowledge from nursing school, but this test was not a test of our knowledge. This test was a test of everything they haven't taught us in nursing school. Students that are A+ students got scores in the 60's on this final. Somehow I managed to pull off a 76..which is still failing (a passing grade is a 77 or higher btw). Today we took our maternal/child/OB final. I chose not to study for this final. I decided that the acute care final was going to kick my butt so I needed to spend every waking hour studying for it instead of the OB final. Turns out the 20 min I spent looking over notes before the final was sufficient enough. I pulled of an 84. It's not an A, but it's not an F! 20 minutes compared to 19 hours well.. let's just say I'm not so happy with the nursing instructors right now. To all of those who were exited from the program due to S T U P I D finals, my heart goes out to you! Keep your head up.

My brain hurts

I don't know, but it is possible that I could have a breakdown at any moment. I have studied for about a total of 16 hours this week for my acute care final on Monday. This could be more than I have studied all semester! This semester was supposed to be one of the most difficult of the 5 semesters of the nursing program. I did not find it to be incredibly difficult or any more difficult that the 2nd semester was which was said to be one of the hardest. I have not stressed (about school) nearly as much as I did in my 2nd semester. Yet this week I have done nothing but study, drink redbull, and sleep. My ability to concentrate on life skills and other things has become nearly impossible. I am sorry to anyone who might be reading this whom I may have snapped at, given a look to, or just been plain rude to in the past week or so. I am hoping that after Tuesday(my last final) that my life will calm down and my emotions will return to a normal state. I'm sad to report that I was in tears 4 times today. I will be back to the fun, silly story tellin' Kathy by mid next week! I will be working at the hospital pretty much ALL of December and will be FULL of great stories to share with all of you!

Finals Week

So I don't really have any funny stories to report since I haven't been at work too much and my clinicals are over for this semester. Last week, I did work on my birthday on a really busy floor at Shands. The other PCA's (buttwipers) told me that I was the best PCA they had up there in a long time and asked if they could get my schedule so they could request me to be sent to that floor everytime. It was quite the compliment. Although, if you ever go to AGH you will find my face on a plaque by the lobby elevators that says I'm PCA of Excelence ;).. I know I'm hott stuff! I don't even work at AGH anymore. I also worked on Saturday and got the pleasure of sitting for a 12 hour shift in a room on the trauma floor with a patient who was in a really bad car accident. This guy got out of restraints multiple times and almost hit me a couple times. He had a very bad brain injury so he didn't really know what was going on. After he would get really agressive he'd get really sweet and tell me he was sorry and that he loved me. Aparently Tim Tebow came to visit us in the room that day, and Hank Williams Jr. Being a PCA is more than just buttwiping-it's also listening to crazy stories, and lots of wrestling. This week is the last week of class and then we have our last final on tuesday! WOoHoo for Christmas break! I can see it now- the light at the end of the tunnel! One more semester to go.

Hi, my name is Clutzo!

If you know me, you know how prone I am to accidents. If you know me, you know that there are often unexplained bruises on my body. Bruises that are weird shapes and in weird places. I will tell you right now-I am not abused, as this may sound like some of the similar case studies we deal with in class. No, no, I am just a CLUTZ!!!! But if you have read my earlier posts you would know this from my most embarrassing moment that happened first semester of nursing school. I have been really sick for the past week. I have had many moments lately where I felt like my head was unattached because I was clearly not thinking straight. Tonight at clinical, my head was attached, I just wasn't walking straight! A few friends and I were walking back from Shands in the tunnel to head back to the VA. We were laughing at me for some reason (probably at how funny my man voice sounds or how ridiculous I am sometimes) and walking and talking and B A M! No warning at all, I ran smack into the wall/doorway. I hit it so hard I flew across to the other side of the hallway and landed on my butt! I smacked my arm pretty hard into the door to where it was instantly red. I gave my friends a real good laugh, but at least they made sure I was ok. Tomorrow is my last day at the VA. I really enjoyed clinical for the most part this semester. My group, instructor and the fun stories were all great! It's even more great that I only have 5 more months til I graduate!!!

Pizza Flavored Pretzels

THANK GOD I only have one more week left at the V.A. Hospital. I have complete respect for the men and women who have served this country and was proud to be able to serve them by caring for them and giving them a chance to share their stories with me, but I can honestly tell you I am ready for something new. I don't think I mentioned in my last post about what happened in the elevators on thursday evening. Anne (a fellow student) and I were shadowing down in the CTICU (Cardio Thoracic Intensive Care Unit) and had wheeled a patient up to the floor that our clinicals usually were held each week. We had a few minutes to eat our dinner while we were up there and were evaluated by our instructor. On our way back down to the CTICU I carried a bucket of bite size pizza flavored pretzels and was eating them by the handfulls. A man (employee of some sort) got on the elevator and I offered him a few of my pretzels (being the kind human being that I am). The man says "Oh yes! I would love me a few of 'dem. But my hands are dirty." So thinking that he doesn't want to reach his dirty hands into the bucket of pretzels to contaminate them all- I poured a few out onto the lid and handed him the lid to pour them into his hands. Well really-the man was thinking his hands were too dirty to put into his mouth or touch any food that was going into his mouth (understandable when you work in a hospital and touch weird things). My friend Anne and I were not thinking this at the time. When he took the lid from me he put his mouth over each individual pretzel on the lid and sucked them up like a vaccuum. His lips and spit got ALL over the lid. Anne and I looked at each other in complete wonder! When I got back to the CTICU I sterilized the lid for about 10 min before I put it back on. When we left to go home Anne and I were in the elevator and another employee got on with us. Anne looked at me and under her breath said "DON'T YOU DARE OFFER ANY MORE PRETZELS!". The man in the elevator didn't hear her, but he was confused when I broke out into a loud roar of laughter.

Dun dun dun...another one bites the dust

So when we were still having our acute care lectures our teacher Trudy taught us a good way to remember how fast a rate to do compressions (for cpr) by singing out loud the song "dun dun dun, another one bites the dust, dun dun dun". I have been in the ICU this week for clinical and was assigned to a patient who was fresh post-op from open heart surgery. Before he arrived in the ICU the charge nurse got a phone call from the OR saying that this patient was very unstable. A comment was made (it might sound horrible for all of you non medical professionals) that this one could be dust. Then two of the nurses started singing the song. I chuckled a bit. (FYI-patients are not allowed to die on the table)

The ICU has been pretty interesting. Open heart guy was too unstable for me to really do anything other than watch the nurses do their thing last night, but tonight I got to see some pretty cool stuff. I discontinued an A-line (arterial line), which is no big-its like removing an IV except you have to hold pressure to the site for about 5 minutes to keep them from bleeding EVERYWHERE! Then there was another patient who had a brain tumor that was wrapped around his pituitary removed. He had a HUGE incision with staples across the top of his head from ear to ear. That was pretty intense, but the best part was he also had a JP drain coming from out of his head. You could see where the tube was sitting under the skin on his forehead! I didn't help other than by holding the patients hand when the Dr. came in to remove the drain and stitch up the hole where it was, but that was pretty neat to see! Only one more week of clinical for this semester! I can't believe it!

Patience with Patients

I was nuts for signing up to work today after the weekend that I had. It was physically and emotionally draining. I really needed today to be my rest day but instead, I got up (an hour earlier than I should have bc of day light savings time), went to church, went to lunch and went to work. My shift was from 3-11. When I went to CSO (the central staffing office-where I report and find out what floor I'll be working on for the day) I found out I would be sitting. This was quite a relief but also a little worrisome. It was great to be able to sit and do nothing for 8 hours and get paid for it, but I was so exhausted I was afraid I was going to fall asleep. I almost did many times! Then I got a phone call-I was sent to a different floor to work as a PCA (patient care assistant-aka buttwiper). I was excited because I was going to be able to pass the time faster, stay awake and work on the floor my friend works on. I was quick to realize that the floor I was transfered to was a rather difficult one! I was assigned a team of 14 patients. Half of these patients were very easy patients that required little. But of course that leaves 7 more. Those 7, well they gave me a run for my money! They wanted to teach me what it really means to have patience and really love on them. I started my 2200 vitals at 2130 (military time people), and was hoping to be done by 22:30-45 so that I could give report and leave by 2300 when my shift was over. As I was doing my vitals I was called to clean up a patient (not on my team) who had vomited all over himself. I was quick to do this and had no problem helping him out. Really, could you imagine?Being so sick you vomited on yourself in your bed and couldn't do anything about it? I returned to my task of doing vitals. I was called away again to clean a patient who was dreaming she was on a bedpan and really wasn't. Ah this poor woman. My heart hurt for her. Finished with her and got back to my task of doing vitals. PCA needed to room 22. DEEP BREATH ok.. PATIENCE! GRACE! I was called away 3 times during vitals to clean patients who had messed themselves. It wasn't the cleaning them up part that I had gotten flustered about. It was that I still had 8 patients to do vitals and chemsticks(blood sugars) and I/O's (ins and outs) on and it was 2245. What time was I supposed to get off tonight? answer: 23oo. What time did I really get off tonight? answer: 0020 (12:20am for those of you who don't know military time). The stupid part is this! It is now 0143 and I am still up and blogging about this night. I should go to bed-school starts at 0900.

Check Offs

I had a check-off this afternoon. A check-off just entails the nursing instructors checking us off on the skills we have learned and should be preforming in the clinical setting. This is a lot tougher than it sounds. We get two "cues", or mess-ups before we fail a check off. Today was a little bit different than normal. We had about 6 skills that we could possibly be checked off on and had no idea which one we were going to get until they called our name to go into the room. They are very picky about following every step just how it is on our sheet and doing it the "Santa Fe way" not the half-assed way the nurses teach us to do it in the hospitals. Check-offs make everyone nervous! Sweaty hands, butterflies in your stomach, and sometimes a bit shaky. When they called my name today, I was kind of nervous because I didn't come early to practice in the lab. I ended up getting the easiest of the skills to check off on. I also got the easiest instructor that was doing the checking off. It was easy breezy. One less thing to worry about this week. NPR- CHECK, Skills check-off- CHECK.. Now all I have to do is pass my Renal Exam this Wednesday!

FACE PLANT

As the last blog was rather disgusting and graphic and has you never thinking of the frosted delicious cereal the same way, I shall share this story with you as a picker-upper. Coming from the family that I do, I don't often experience embarrassing stories. I was taught at a young age to laugh it off with everyone else. Well my clinical group LOVES to point out embarrassing things that I do and say. It doesn't bother me a bit, but I thought I'd share a few of the things that they bring up often, starting with the least embarrassing.
One of my first weeks of clinical this semester I had a patient who seemed kind of down in the dumps. I knew he was the type of patient that was a jokester with all of the sarcastic remarks he made. He called me into his room for the most ridiculous of things, just because he could (ie. scratch his back). One time he called me in just to ask me, "So, what is it that you do anyway?"..my response "Well, I do all of the things a nurse would do." (sounds good so far). "Well, what's that?" "Oh, you know, I give medications, I take vitals, I do assessments.." still not enough for him so I continued..here it comes..WORD VOMIT "I wipe butts." I got a smile from him which is what I was looking for, but I had forgotten about the other patients in the room and the other nursing students. Everyone outside the curtain was laughing at our conversation. I wasn't too concerned about them until I heard a voice from outside the curtain say, "AND.." This voice was my clinical instructor... SO I then continued on "and I, uh, chart andI .." so on and so on. I kept listing bc I got nervous about my instructer hearing me. My friends bring that up often. But not as often as this...
Back in the first semester of nursing school I was still nervous and trying to fit in. I was just starting to make friends and feel somewhat comfortable with the demands of the program. A few of my friends and I went to subway in the school cafeteria after class. We only had a short time to eat because we had a lab we had to go to. So after the group picking on me because I am quite the target for a good joke, we were getting ready to finish up and head back to the nursing building. I decided I was going to go back inside to refill my drink and everyone else said they'd meet me around the corner from the picnic tables. So.. I go in, fill my drink and walk out the front door of the cafeteria. Here I see the group kind of leaving me. I got a bit excited and tried to walk faster. Not watching where I was walking (because I was watching the group) I stepped off the pavement where this little palm tree is and face planted to the ground! My cookie in one hand flew out of it's package and into the dirt. The cup in the other hand was crushed when I tried to break my fall. My backpack is flipped over my head and I am in complete shock over what had just happened. I looked around to notice there was a large group of people standing by the wall just looking at me and laughing hysterically. I thought quickly and grabbed my ankle (even though it wasn't hurt) and started cursing like a sailor! If I was hurt, it would make them feel bad, and be less embarrassing for me. I look up again and see one of the guys with his hand out towards me. I reached for it for help to get up and he pulled it back. It was then that I realized that he was only POINTING at me not trying to help me. I am even more embarrassed at this point, really flustered and still fumbling to get up (backpack still flipped over my head). Got up and limped away(bc of my fake injury) seeing my friends in the far distance and still hearing the roaring laughter from the crowd of people. Out of the roar, I heard one girl strugglig to say (because she was still laughing so hard) as I was walking away, "Are you ok?". I tried to respond but all I could do at this point was lift up my hand to her, attempt to smile, and just cry. I finally caught up to the group of nursing students. They found me covered in dirt, with skinned knees and hands, a bright cherry red face with tears rolling down my cheeks, and with out my drink refill. I told them the story because they were all concerned (for a whole 5 min) and then we joked about it as we went into lab. Many people had asked what was wrong because I still was puffy and red from crying and still had bloody knees. I was still pretty embarrassed for about a week afterwards. Then I got over it and photoshoped a picture of me falling and sent it to my group of friends. From then, I've been the butt of most jokes.

Frosted Flakes for breakfast

THIS BLOG CONTAINS GRAPHIC IMAGERY, VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED

A few of my friends in clinical and I were sitting around the table during our dinner break comparing gross or ridiculous stories. Each story trying to top the one before it. I knew that no one could top my story. I have yet to have a patient top this one. About 8 months ago I was working on a pediatric unit. We had a 14 yr old girl who was well known to the staff, someone we'd refer to as a "frequent flyer". She was admitted to the hospital for a chronic condition she has because she needed treatment. However, this girl had more going on that just this chronic condition. She had a very bad yeast infection. The nurse was very concerned because this was the most advanced form of a yeast infection she had ever seen. She went in to do her assessment and check on the status of this infection. She noticed while doing her examination that the yeast had spread up from between her legs, towards her abdomen. The skin was flakey, red, foul smelling and just not pretty to look at. The nurse continued to do a thurough examination of her skin when the girl reached down between her legs and started to peel off a large quarter size chunk of her skin. Right before the nurse was about to tell the girl that picking at it could be causing it to get worse, the girl took the large, crusty, infected flake of skin and put it in her mouth and swallowed it. The nurse completely disgusted was in shock and could not say anything. She looked at the girl and then at her mother who was at the bedside, neither said a word. The nurse stood up and walked out to share this story with me and another nurse so that she was not alone in feeling the way she did. So at the time, this was by far the most horrible thing I had ever experienced and I was not actually IN the room.
After leaving work that day I went to my friend Stefanie's house who is also a nurse. I had to share with her what had happened just as I have told you. We then began to joke about it. I can tell you this, I am not sure that I can ever eat Frosted Flakes ever again.

I was hessitant about sharing this story with you, but tonight one of the girls at clinical came to me and told me that she's been eating frosted flakes for breakfast every day this week. Every morning she pours a bowl she can't help but laugh, be grossed out for a second, and think about the insane things that happen in the walls of a hospital! She told me this was a must blog, so this is for you Delores! Hope I didn't scare anyone away! It is my hope that I don't have any more disgusting things happen like this.

Butt burps

I promise that this whole blog will not be all about butts. Let me just start off by telling you this brief story before I lead into my story from clinical....I have been babysitting for a family from my old church for about 7 years that has two boys and a little girl. For some reason either one of the parents had decided they did not like it when their kids used the word fart, so instead, to this day, they call it a butt-burp...that being said I will now tell you about my patient from clinical and come back to this above story.
So I was at clinical one evening assigned to a patient with a fresh colostomy. He was only 2 days post op and was not wanting to do much of anything. Being the great nursing facility that it is, we were not going to let him not do anything but just lay there because that delays healing, so we convinced him that he was going to walk around in the halls. It took 2 nurses and myself to get this man out of bed. The two nurses assisted him from each side and I stood in front of him for extra safety precautions. 1 2 3- and he's up in a standing position facing me. On the journey up he let's out a LONG, LOUD, EXPLOSIVELY STRONG belch, in my face none the less. That alone was rather disturbing to me, but that's not all. When I say explosively strong I mean it vibrated his cheeks and the gust of wind was so strong that it blew my hair out of my face. Patients with fresh colostomies are prone to experiencing a lot of gas. This man however, could not expell gas from the rear as most of us do, but the gas that was dwelling in his intestines had to be forced back up and out. So like I was saying, this belch was explosively strong. I had never smelled something so aweful come from someone's mouth. It ranked like S***!! I tried to contain myself the best I could and not make a face at this bomb that went off in my face, when the patient asked me (while still in the middle of the belch) "Is this normal?". In my mind the only thing I was thinking was, "HELL NO! IT IS NOT NORMAL TO FART OUT OF YOUR MOUTH!" but being the skilled professional that I am and having the best effective communication training, I smiled at the patient and assured him that it was normal to be experiencing gas because his bowels were waking up from the surgery. So I ask you this, (who ever could possibly be reading) if a butt can burp what do you call it when you fart out of your mouth?

The rantings of a nursing student...

Let me first off start by saying.. I NEVER INTENDED ON EVER BEING A BLOGGER! I have always been a fan of reading my friend Aly's blog. Her stories and random posts are addicting and are something I look forward to reading. I never thought I'd have anything too interesting to post. I then found out very recently that my friend Val has a blog as well. Very quickly I was addicted to her blog, starting from her first post I read all of her posts in one sitting. Then it came to me! I can share my sick nasty stories (w/o violating hippa of course) from work!!! There isn't a day that I come home from work and am not grossed out by one thing or another that happened at work/clinical. So here begins the rantings of a nursing student and her experiences in the ne professional world of BUTT WIPING!